Sadness and Disappointment

4th April 2009, night.

I was chating with somebody and that somebody told me something which is really shocking to me. And that shocking story really really really make me sad and down. I was very disappointed too. Suddenly felt like this world is meaningless.

Even breaking up with my ex-gf and having my ex-gf telling me that the first love I thought it would be meant nothing to her is never this sad. The story really make me sad and disappointed. When I heard it I really felt like I want to cry!! Not because somebody pass away or something but........no matter what, I was really sad and down accompanied with huge huge disappointment.

I hate myself so much right now~~!!!!!!!!

I really felt like crying. Don't know when only I can get over this.

GOD!!! Help me!!! I want to cry!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate this!!! I hate everything that I care so much!!!

I am such a useless and stupid guy!!!

Shit!!! SHIT!!!

Hey, if you are reading this, then I really wish to let you know that you really have disappointed me. No matter who you are, where you are or whether you read this or not, you really really hace disappointed me.

I have never felt this sad and down before........

And I have never have a bad day like this.

Already have problems with my friend then now hearing this news some more, I would declare that 4th April 2009 is my worse day ever.

And lastly, with my tears almost coming out, I really hope I can forget what I heard and carry on with my life as if I never know this story exist.

I hope I wont suicide because of this.

I always thought that I am a happy person no matter what, but this time, I am really proved wrong!!!

Good night...Angels...I need you...I am really sad... :'( :'( :'(